Who is holding me back is something I have been questioning a lot lately. I could blame circumstances, I could blame others, or things that seem out of my control. But the more I think about it, the clearer the answer becomes.
I am most definitely holding myself back in many different ways. I think many of us have done that in some capacity. If I am honest, there is a lack of belief in myself.
I do not believe the things I envision to happen to actually happen. Sure, I can see it but there is still some doubt in mind that does not allow me to fully believe in myself.
I may be too hard on myself … I probably am.
Where does believing in yourself even begin? Seeing my son grow up I think we initially do believe in ourselves but lose it overtime with experience and influences. It’s picked on bit by bit until we gain the ability to build our hope and belief again.
Not believing in myself is one component to holding myself back. Not feeling like I DESERVE what I envision is a different component.
Am I worthy of the life I see myself having? Is it too good to be true? Is it TOO good for me?
All that questioning plays a part in believing what I can have or experience certain things while I am on this planet. I think it is worth questioning why do I not think I deserve it.
For me it comes from my upbringing and putting myself in a box. Someone who grew up with government aid, someone who grew up in a one-bedroom apartment with 5 or 6 other individuals is not “supposed” to have the life I envision. How silly am I to think such things? There is no way I can live the life of comfortability, the one of being content, happy, and at peace.
But why not me? Why can’t I do it? Because I do not ALLOW myself to.
I put up all sorts of blocks. I become hopeless because I do not think I can have or deserve the very things I am aiming for. Isn’t it ridiculous reading that sentence? I feel silly writing it. It seems like a pointless cycle of thought.
To stop it I must not simply being aware what is occurring but actively attempt to stop the blocks when I notice them occurring. When I hear or feel that self-doubt coming along, I have to smush it. First word that came to mind. But I do. We do. There are times where we have to stop believing ourselves to then believe in ourselves.
Confusing I know.
But it is true. Stop believing the doubtful things we tell ourselves. The crap we have been conditioned to think about ourselves whether it’s been through the media, individuals, and or our overall experiences. Instead of saying I can’t have that or I don’t deserve that, switch things to why can’t I have that? I CAN do that.
It is easier said than done. However, if I or you want to execute the changes you have been wanting in your life you have to not only envision it but sincerely believe that you can attain it, and once you receive it that you deserve it.
Share what is holding you back and if it’s yourself, why do you think you are holding yourself back? Let me know below!!